Family Visit

Bob had physical therapy this morning and he stood up holding two parallel bars. He practiced taking steps by moving his left foot forward while the physical therapist moved his right foot forward. My mom arrived at the end of the physical therapy session. She did not witness the other therapy sessions as they happened in the morning. Visiting hours start at one in the afternoon.

My husband and I took our two children to see Bob for the first time today. We met him and my mom in a sunny room at the end of the hallway. My daughter read to vovô, my son put together a puzzle with him and they all played tic-tac-toe. Bob and my daughter tied, but Bob won when he played my son (he doesn't really know the rules and preferred making squares instead of circles...) The children behaved well at the hospital and acted naturally around Bob. I was apprehensive at first. This isn't a setting that my children are used to and it could have been intimidating or even scary. But they were genuinely happy to see Bob and my daughter didn't want to leave at the end of the day. On the drive home my son expressed the same feeling saying "I love vovô so much, I wish I could spend the whole day with him."

My husband and the children broke up the visit by leaving on a hunt for an electric shaver. The hospital staff is against shaving with a razor due to the blood thinners that Bob is taking. The nurse mentioned Bob will continue to take these blood thinners until he no longer sitting or lying down for such long periods of time. They help minimize the risk of clots, which is higher when a person can't move much.

While they were gone, my mom met with Bob's case worker for the first time. She coordinates the team of three therapists and doctor and acts as a liaison between the family and the team. The case worker will meet with the team by the end of the week to discuss Bob's progress and set goals for his stay at the hospital. These goals may change every time they meet, depending on how Bob improves.

Bob had to move to another room after all. It is on the same floor. Bob was moved closer to the nurses' station as he requires to be checked in on every fifteen minutes. This is due to his inability to ask for assistance. I hung family pictures on the wall as well as some drawings that my kids made for vovô. Bob has a nice view of the science museum and the water.

There are lots of aspects about Spaulding that are different from the hospital in Rio. The most noticeable one is the fact that my mom was with Bob all the time in Brasil. This meant being present for all the therapies and taking an active role in them. My mom helped translate the portuguese, fed Bob in the beginning, held him and exercised with him during physical therapy. She also slept at the hospital nearly every night. At Spaulding she has a less active role. On Bob's first day my mom was told to be his advocate. The director has told me that my mom should rest while Bob is at the rehabilitation hospital because once he is discharged, she will be the full time care giver. So now my mom is fulfilling her role and advocating on his behalf: Insisting that he get checked upon every fifteen minutes, ensuring that he has a bath everyday, asking that his bed is by the window, making sure he receives the bracelet that signals he is a fall risk... She has found that no place is infallible.

Taking care of someone has many forms. As Bob relearns to be independent and take care of his needs, we are all adjusting and learning how to best serve him. Last time I fought back the urge to open his milk carton for him. Today I helped him take the plastic wrap off his slice of cake at dinner time. He asked for help, I quite literally jumped at the chance. My husband got him the electric razor and held up the mirror while Bob used it. The grandkids showed their love in ways that grown ups can't. Relatives called to check how Bob is doing. Friends and family have left sweet and encouraging comments on the blog (thanks, Diane!) And so it goes, one day at a time.

Thanks for reading and keep the positive thoughts and prayers coming.