Dear Old Friends

Today Bob had full plate of therapies: occupational, physical, group occupational and speech.

During occupational therapy he practiced using a long grabber to put on his socks and pants by himself. Bob controlled a trigger which would open and close pincers at the end of a long stick. This can help him gain some independence while getting dressed.

At physical therapy, it was decided that a size eight and a half six wide would be the best fit for his right foot to comport the brace. His left foot will be his regular shoe size. My mom can now return the other pairs to the very generous New Balance store in Brighton. (I don't mind giving them a plug, they allowed my mom to purchase all pairs at a 50% discount!)

My mother took my son to see Bob at noon while I had a routine OBGYN appointment. I met them at Spaulding shortly after Bob had eaten his lunch and the four of us hung out for a bit until Bob's speech therapy began at one in the afternoon. It was right around that time that Max and Bill, friends from New York, came to visit Bob. They have been friends for decades, having met while living on Browning Drive across the street from each other. We all left Bob with Caitlin for his speech therapy and went to have lunch at the cafeteria. At two we came back up and after Dominic and I said our goodbyes, the two couples that used to have dinner together every single friday night, hung out until it was Bob's bedtime. Here is a picture of Bob with Max and Bill (and a little guy who loves to be in the middle of the action):

Bill showed Bob pictures from trips to Europe on his ipad and they all talked a lot. As blog readers, they were curious to see the traffic game and the tile game so my mom showed them what I have been writing about. It occurred to me to post a link to these two things in case anyone else out there is curious. Just click on the links that follow to get directed to the amazon site for these games. This is the traffic game, and this is the letter tile game. Bill and Max gave Bob a Nintendo Wii console along with some games so that when Bob goes home, he can continue to challenge his coordination and motor skills. Bob was very happy to see both Max and Bill and they had a good time catching up.

At the end of the day, after Bob was dressed for bed and my mom was getting ready to come home, Bob surprised her. Every day when my mom leaves she tells him she loves him. Today Bob said "I love you" back to my mom for the first time. She was very happy when she walked in the door this evening at our house.

On a sad note, one of Bob's dear friends passed away yesterday from a stroke she suffered on friday. Eleanor was Bob's associate Dean for part of the time that he was Dean of Arts and Sciences at Farmingdale. She was currently the Dean of Arts and Sciences at Farmingdale. Bob and Eleanor kept in touch both professionally (Bob would continue to give her advice long after retiring) and personally (Eleanor attended my wedding and came to visit my parents after they moved to Massachusetts). We are all shocked and deeply saddened by this news. We have decided not to tell Bob about her passing at this time. My mom has concluded, and I agree, that there is little Bob can do to comfort her family or even express his sympathies. We are also fearful that Bob could fall into a depression given how much Eleanor was dear to his heart. Her cause of death might also trigger feelings that would best be avoided at this time. I hope one day Bob understands our decision to keep this from him even if only temporarily. Again, I draw parallels to how I recently handled giving bad news to my children: It took me a few days to tell them about Bob's stroke and I did it in stages. Maybe that would be the way to approach Eleanor's death with Bob.

Thanks for reading. Today we offer our thoughts and prayers to Eleanor's family. She will be missed.